Dear friends, today I’m posting the first chapter of my book Laura Must Die. This book is both irreverent and impossible to hold back once you get started.
LAURA MUST DIE
Laura sat poised in front of her computer desperately trying to contain the overwhelming emotions that shook her whole body. Realising after several minutes of lust infused anguish, the words “I want you” would be his final ones, for the moment anyway. She was aware those words he signed off with were always intended to tease. This man was now venturing into her dreams both day and night, always leaving her breathless and wanting more.
She hung onto those last words, but it was only moments before wild fantasies filled her head. Her fingertips began to caress and stroke her whole body while she imagined his fingers continuing on, from where hers had left. She knew she was delicious to touch. The sensation was no longer on the outside, it was taking over from within, and she had passed the point where usually, she would stop. Just for a second, maybe less, she liked to tease, but more importantly control, even if it was her own body, holding back for that one second made the intensity of her orgasm out of this world!
This time it was different. She was no longer in control. She could feel herself gushing as she exploded from within. This was a new ecstasy even for Laura.
She lay dizzy, her body still taught. Then she opened her eyes. The morning sun was glistening off her dewy skin; she reached for her camera as she could not wait for the moment when she would first show him the pictures he had been longing for. Laura knew he would not be disappointed.
She decided to keep these pictures to herself for now as she was definitely worth waiting for. She admired what she saw as she caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. Whilst still glowing and tingling from head to toe, she took more shots of herself, each one that little bit more provocative and revealing than the one before it. She would reveal these one by one. Quite when, she had not decided, yet!
Today would be in her thoughts for a long time.
_Are you there?
She prayed he would be, as she could not seem to begin her working day until she had received his first words!
_I am here, every other day, I sit staring blankly at the screen until your name appears. You have captivated me in such a way!
_You never seem to sleep!
_ Insomnia has become a great burden… I want much chat with you late at night when you are free to express yourself.
Unbeknown to Laura at the time, those first words that she had replied would be the beginning of a masked hedonistic connection that she could not be able to tear herself away. She was experiencing a new chemical state of euphoria which was drawing her in more and more each day. She escaped into a dream world and her mind no longer seemed to concentrate on anything other than the screen in front of her.
_How are things? –He asked.
_ Sometimes it almost feels as if other words were alien, as if we were alone in a world where nothing else matters.
Laura felt it too; it was as if he was behind her. She collected herself while she was still able to. Now would not be appropriate and she could no longer rely on her self control. But she finally collected herself and answered:
_My days seem to start earlier and earlier as I wait for you to log on.
_Your days are all yours to create, mine to fulfil.
_My energy now is channelled by the possessed emotions I feel, that make me write continuously without pause or even breathe. I smile to myself, imagining we were playing this game with no known ending but in a room full of people. We glance at each other and understand what no one else does, but then my smile turns to frustration as I remember this game is still only virtual.
_You don’t like this situation?
_I have awakened very tender this morning, you must pardon me. It would be with very little effort from you to take full advantage of me at this moment.
_Your charm and sincerity is exhilarating I had to come to the office today. I had to make sure you were still connected, that you had not forgotten me, as you are in my mind every second of the day.
_Are you at work? – She enquired.
_Yes, today I could have arrived later, but I am here more eager than I have ever been. This new order means me working overtime!
The hours he now worked were erratic and unsociable to say the least due to the fact his mind was exploding thinking about her. On the end of that line, she was that somebody whom he felt he already knew, the one that lighted up his thoughts like the first rays of sunshine in the morning, the one that darkened those same thoughts not knowing anything about her, the one who vindicated these emotions of love and lust he felt internally, the inner burden being released as if wild horses were being set free into a forest, galloping into something inviting, yet unknown, the fauna glistening with fresh rain.
He felt new, lighter, but slightly wary.
_Ditto. You have released me, but now it’s as if in some way reliant, both in pleasure and in work. You have a certain control over me as I do over you.
_ Did you enjoy your weekend?
_I spent it by myself. It was indifferent.
_I’ve been moping around the house all day. You were in my thoughts.
_My thoughts of you were unbearable too. I felt myself counting the days; the hours and the minutes that I still must wait until I experience your scent for the first time, your body fresh from the shower, your wet hair dripping down your back. You appear like a mirage through the steam. Then you step on to the tiles and cover yourself up, even though I see you are shivering. The quiver of your body excites me and I am immediately rock hard.
_I am aching with anticipation until the time we meet.
_When you come to New York, come prepared and hungry for unknown depths of depraved pleasure, as I want to fill each one of your senses. There will not be a millimetre of your body both inside and out, I will not have.
_You scare me, certain orifices of my body I have not yet sacrificed, let alone had explored by another…
_My tongue will be fused into each and every one of them, over and over again.
_I cannot wait to give way to your expertise!
_I will be absolutely effective…
_You are a little full of yourself, aren’t you? You once only wanted my soul, my body was a bonus but I like your self appreciation, it’s very horny.
_For both, our body is the shape that contains our soul and connects itself with the world.
_I will possess your soul through your body; it’s much more rewarding than having your body through your soul.
_You are a poet.
_And you are my muse.
_Flattery will drive you anywhere, but you too are my source of inspiration. My next novel will be about you.
_I love the fact that I serve as your inspiration, we can create each chapter in bed together.
_Like everything else we do, the more we practise, the easier it becomes, and once you are good at it, the reward and satisfaction know no limits.
_When we are together in the flesh, I will give you a lot of unimaginable ideas for your future novels. I will possess you once more, both in body and soul, the effect I will have on you will help your writing continue to flow, as it has done since our first contact.
_You lead me to believe my stories will be more and more captivating.
_One day I would like you to be writing the next text page to your next erotic novel whilst I am performing cunnilungus on you. I think that you will end up writing a great story!
_I am still unsure if I can trust you. You must convince me again so I am able to give myself wholly when I come to you.
_It would be very easy for me to tell you that I am trustworthy, even if it was not the case.
_There are so many evil people hidden behind the screen, pretending to be something or someone they are not.
Thousands of miles from anyone who knows him, he had the illusion that his past was unimportant…
_You must trust only your instincts, but I can tell you I am very selective, this is why; it is you that I want beside me, in my bed.
_You say you are very selective, but this could be about your future prey…
_Yes, you are my sexual prey, but you will be fully aware when I shall pounce on you. Your eyes will light up as I take you and you will take me.
_ You could also be my prey as I may be equally as bad as you, or even worse!
_ I believe you will be equally as bad and I count the seconds until I will find out.
_ Did you receive the photos? You didn’t mention them.
_Your pictures are amazing, just as I imagined you would look, but this now only feels like a consolation prize. It leaves me longing for your body alongside mine even more. Who is the girl standing next to you?
_ My best friend Laura. A very common name I must admit!
_Laura…. Beautiful name, alas… I’m afraid to say, there is only the one pearl in that picture, and she is a compulsive romantic…….
_ My friend Laura is married, but she lives as if she was single. Would you like to know more about her?
_Would you let her loose on me!
_Why not? She added.
_If that’s an affirmative, I would say lets give it a go even though it straight away breaks my rules of engagement. Never get involved with a married woman…
_Tell me a bit more about her.
_Married or no, she has valid, strong standards relationships which I have great deal of respect for. You can get in touch at this email address firstname.lastname@example.org
_Boyland. She also, is a writer.
_Would she tick my boxes? More important, would I, hers? Well, thanks for the pictures anyway.
_I knew you would like them. There are more, but you must wait.
_I fantasise about you naked, glistening in the sun. You must send the rest!
_ Don’t be impatient, I will send more tomorrow. Then I will soon be with you.
_When we make love, I will look deep into your eyes, and I want to see my passion reflecting back at me mirrored through the windows of your mind. I do not know how I can cope until then.
_You always mention my eyes. Why?
_When I caress the smoothness of your skin, my passion will guide my hands, but in my mind it is your eyes that will draw me.
_You may have seen far better throughout your life…
_Nothing is better or worse… nothing is more or less wished for… and you are my desire, now, today, tomorrow…
_Tell me more about your thoughts of those first pictures. She asked.
_You want to hear my naughty thoughts, babe?
_Yes. That way we will feed off each other! She answered.
_I still have them retained in my mind, each one available like a slide show when I close my eyes.
_Please tell me more sweet things…
_I must tell you those face to face. This way of communicating is already far too limited. So I look forward to the minute we meet when I will prove myself to you!
_You are so arrogant!
_Unfortunately there are many feelings that are not understood as they should be through a flat computer screen. They must be proved skin on skin. It hurts me in such a way you could not completely comprehend.
_It hurts you… and you have no one there to console you?
_No one that takes of my time or thoughts, as you do.
_I thought I was not your only virtual lover.
_You have never been or ever will be virtual, you are very real to me.
_I am very real. You are so right and also very true. Unlike you, a shadow that hides behind the mask of words which are aimed to please your particular target. This now feels like YOUR game… I will not be played!
_Be patient… You will not quit. It is OUR game!
_Your apparent anger arouses and excites my senses. I must see the final pictures of the sequence you shot of yourself that day. Will you send them? I would like them tomorrow morning…waiting for me when I log on. You cannot imagine the intense pleasure this anticipation already gives me!
_Keep checking…they will be sent after midnight. Enjoy!
_The pictures will be more than I can cope with in my morning. I desire you so much. It is a pity that you are not with me now as near both of us to naked as I know you are. The picture I have almost seems lifeless as I think of you in the flesh.
_Beautiful objects are not lifeless and flat, they have flaws and curves, individuality!
_Still I will embrace what I have for now. The slight imperfections of reality that I have yet to explore will make my desires even stronger!
_You are very sure of having me. It still seems as if it is your game!
_It is our game, you know this by now; please excuse me if I still make you feel unsure… But I will have you, of this I am sure, and if your legs don’t shake and give way from under you as we pause during our first kiss, when our bodies are no longer entwined, I will be greatly disappointed.
_You would question your sexual attraction for the first time ever? With this confidence that you exude, why have you sought out a relationship behind a computer screen?
_Maybe I am looking for the ultimate perfection as I have it vividly framed in my mind. As if it was some kind of Holy Grail!
_A Holy Grail? It seems as if you are searching for the impossible let alone the ultimate, surely you will never be satisfied if this is what you are truly searching for…
_I am sure I will find it; I may have, already found it. In the search of this quest I may have already fulfilled more fantasies than I thought were possible.
_How will you recognise your Holy Grail or how do you know we have it within our grasp?
_I will know. I have once experienced the realization of entire fulfilment; these sensations are being resurrected with every bit of contact I receive from you… I feel it. I will awaken feelings so deep from within you, your body and your mind will be in a constant trance, not knowing whether it is awake or asleep, fulfilling my original aim.
His thinking and prose were driven by a deliberate style that emphasized complexity…
_Are you challenging me? You are so full of vanity!
_I would never need to challenge you! I am not vain. I am sincere. Do not patronize me!
_I apologize. The way I am feeling, my emotions… have been locked away for twenty years…In that time I have not once for a second let my guard down. I don’t believe I can fully release myself again. You must be aware this liaison has just stepped up a level.
_I am ready for you to lead this game!
_The art and feeling of love improve with the knowledge and experience gained with each unique relationship.
_You realise then, to remain and to grow with what is unique yet in someway comfortable.
_I believe that too. The trivialities we committed at eighteen bear nothing to what we deal with at thirty or forty, we now are able to enjoy more. The stomach ache and palpitations that took over at eighteen, when the telephone did not ring, no longer play a part in your day.
_You have no bad words to say…ever. You are always loving yet down to earth.
_I live in the real world, yet still need challenges. Impossible challenges that test me, that keeps my adrenaline rushing.
_I live by these same rules.
_You must never be submissive.
_This challenge is enticing.
_I look forward to taking the lead for real!
_You have turned this situation, unless I am sure I know my mind, I may not be that easy.
_I will await your call though you must not fall in love with me.
_My defences are not crashed easily.
_We have extreme chemistry but it is based on distance, mystery and enticement. To love would be a dangerous thing.
_Distance fuels the wanton feelings. Routine would kill it.
_Probably, but I am intense and distance does not allow me to explore this intensity that controls my senses and is exploited solely by you.
_Why don’t you just enjoy what we have, instead of trying to imagine what we could have.
_As you are, I am searching for an impossible thing, as it stands my search continues to exist. If I were to find it, boredom would be sure to set in.
_As you know I am in search of the same.
_I have your picture in front of me. I zoom into your eyes and imagine how they will ignite when I am inside you.
_Again you talk about my eyes, is it my eyes that excite you most?
_Are you excited, now?
_I will not make things easy for you. You must surrender more details of yourself, this will assure me of your sincerity and will be the confirmation that if you had to fight for me…you would!
_I must be sure you would put up the same fight. The achievement for each of us would be different yet still exciting with the feelings of great success as we both come out as winners.
_It bemuses me that you also wish for me to fight. I hope the prize is worth it!
_Do not worry, your prize is exquisite, as you know!
_No I do not know. How do I know? You have told me barely anything about yourself. Give me more. Open yourself up. I want to be excited by the person you are, not just what I am sure you can give me.
_What do you want to know?
_ Everything. The rules of play require give and take.
_My life is too ordinary to be of interest, let alone exciting.
_Even ordinary people have extraordinary circumstances in which they find themselves.
_I am aware you have many questions that you feel you need answered. I realise I must talk about myself soon.
_And If what you tell me puts me off you?
_Then we will both have lost something we wanted, without ever having the satisfaction and pleasure it may bring!
_What if, when we meet I cannot bear it, if you were to brush against my skin as we sit for a coffee the very first time?
_So what a pity for you! Do you want a reaction?
_I will realise as soon as I see you, even if you do not see me, whether it will be yes or it will be no!
_You have not realised it, yet?
_ At this moment, you rank as a six!
_Then I must work quickly to make you rank me higher!
_You have an amazing amount of determination!
_Yes, when it is up to me!
_I don’t doubt it. The way you play, would surely be a great performance if not controlled by you!
_I am still analyzing if you deserve my time.
_Consider it. I think that you would not be here if for one moment your precious time was being wasted!
_I can be very bad!
_Congratulations, but this one facet of yours does not faze or convince me.
_This morning I awoke on the wrong foot. I hope my arrogance does not offend you.
_No problem, I don’t upset easily. If the person I am talking to is not authentic, I would not waste my time, but leave. It does not make sense to get upset.
_Do you find it difficult to be upset with me?
_You flatter yourself. Does it bother you that I do not beg with sweet words, darling?
_Is darling the sweetest word you know?
_You really need a lesson in love, though I know you will not stand to be the student! But if you submit to this lesson in love, and this causes you to back away, we will not have fulfilled the heights that I could otherwise take you to; those dizzy heights you deserve and would achieve if I were to be the tutor first.
_You always have to be one up, don’t you?
_There are things that I am sure about and others, which I am not.
_Are you sure I will come and see you?
_Yes, but I can wait if I feel you are not yet ready.
_What about your work? And mine?
_We will schedule a time, that is for certain!
_And after, we will both return to work, unable to walk properly!
_I hope the foundation of what we are building together from this distance has many more levels than just sex.
_Each time I touch myself, whilst lost in thoughts of you, continues to be more and more explosive. The delay of reality excites me too much!
_I can assure you there is a lot for us yet to explore. The need I have for you is immense, yet the intensity of waiting is, in its self satisfaction on a new level.
_The level of satisfaction I will take you to will blow what you feel now out of the water, I promise, very soon. It makes me very happy for now that you do not request anything from me that compromises my lifestyle.
_Respecting that, one request that I do have is… You must send me the next instalments of the pictures you have taken.
_You will have them tomorrow.
_I want them all, including the most explicit! I am waiting for a picture, where for the first time; I will not look straight into your eyes.
_As you wish.
_Tomorrow I will turn on my computer with an expectant smile fixed on my face as I await the images of you, the ones that will control me, overpowering any concentration and willpower I would normally have to function through the day.
_I wait for a reciprocating dream that will play along side yours, where we awake at exactly the same moment, each one of us with the same feeling, pausing for a moment to recreate the visions that we were indulging in picturing this moment, always as a dawn brings the scent of you to me.
_You must come to me before this overpowering mutual passion between us is diluted.
_If this could be diluted it would be pointless for us to continue on this journey.
_Intensive passion is not good over distance and time. If we are not reincarnated in the next life, we may have to live with regret of what could have been if…
_Having you and loving you will be my pleasure.
_Is that all you have to say?
He understood her temperament and was torn about confronting her, but he knew she was quitting his game without warning.
_I enjoy when you get upset. You must have an interesting expression. I love to demand and to receive what I have demanded. I also love when it is you that demands and I respond as immediately as you, without the need for a thank you or acknowledgement from either. Send me the pictures!
_Open your mail, I have just sent you one, not in full response to your demand, only the first instalment. I will have to trust you entirely before I proceed with the best! Tell me if you like what you have already received, I also enclosed something more as well, actually, I started to write it yesterday. Laura said.
_I am already twisted with desire, longing for your exquisite, writhing body rubbing against mine, your incredible nipples like flowers that open and bloom in the sunlight as my mouth approaches them! I cannot wait to have you in your entirety, taking you way out of your comfort zone, feeding your orgasm until you lose your perfect posture evolving into an everlasting spasm taking you over from head to toe. SEND ME MORE and trust me, remember once and for all, I will never betray you!
_What are you wearing right now?
_I’m sat here in just my pants and tee-shirt at the moment.
_Which colour are your pants?
_I should say black, but that would be fibbing They are light blue very small brief which are bulging in the warm weather. Tell me about your pants now?
_I’m wearing a pink tanga.
_Mmmmm- I’d love to kiss your ass as well as every other part of your body!
_You are incorrigible!
_I want my lips and tongue touching, kissing, licking that velvety skin that nature has given you, slide my hands along and inside your delicious body, conscious that from the very first touch, there will never be an end to you, merely, a transitory orgasm, repeating and repeating as always, when later thoughts of you come back to me, recapturing your image in my mind. But it is only your flesh that can really produce these sensations in unimaginable ways!
_I am tired and must now lie down.
_I will be with you, as you are lying there.
_I wish I could give you a great big hug, I send you my kisses.
_The kisses you sign off with, always brighten my day and dismiss the doubts I have of myself.
_Here everything is in shadow. I will need the light of your beautiful eyes to recreate the fireworks in our shared dreams.
_ Gosh, your craft is poetry and what a joy is to be enlightened!